Women’s take on men of different ethnic groups

We asked a group of women what they thought about Xhosa, Zulu, Tswana and Venda gents

It’s always interesting to hear what people have to say about ethnic groups in South Africa. These ideas are often inaccurate and not reflective of an entire group of people.

We asked a group of women about their perceptions – both positive and negative – of Xhosa, Zulu, Venda and Tswana gents, and each of them had very different opinions and perspectives.

If anything, this exercise revealed that ideas that people have about others are often influenced by an individual’s personal experience, proving that one should never judge someone, especially based on the language they speak.

Onke (28)


The bad
Xhosa men like to make everything about them. So as the woman, you must take all their nonsense and still be okay with it. Even when you go into a marriage with a Xhosa guy, the expectation is that you must just deal with the fact that at some point he’s going to cheat on you. That’s what happens; that’s what they do.You are going to get your heart broken – that’s standard.

The good
I like how much the Xhosa respect and honour their tradition. I like how much they make an effort to maintain their knowledge of it, and the effort and pride they carry in speaking their language.

READ MORE: #AskWomen: Does the way a man speaks matter?


The bad
I think Zulu men are very much of the mind that it’s their way or the highway. But I don’t know; they are raised to believe that they are men and should be highly respected in society by virtue of just that. They are also just a bit too stubborn – if he says the sky is red, there’s nothing you can say that will make him believe otherwise.

The good
The good thing about Zulu men is that they take pride in the fact that they’re a man and that’s very attractive to a lot of women. They are strong, assertive, know what they want and they know what they stand for. Zulu men are also quite straightforward and stay true to one thing. So I guess their negative is also their positive.


The bad
There is no flexibility in the household where Venda men are concerned. If he’s the type of man that wants you to serve him food on your knees, guess what? You better buy Bio-Oil for your knees because they are going to end up being as black as the night!

The good
I don’t know much about Venda men, but I’ve heard that they take care of their families like nobody’s business. They are raised to be providers and they know what it means to be one. They might live in small flats here in Johannesburg, but back at home, they have built gorgeous homes for themselves and their families – their priorities are right!


The bad
Tswana are so stingy, baya vimba! That’s it. You will never find a Tswana blesser.

The good
Tswana men are nice; I think they are pushovers, but they’re nice. I think every girl wants a Tswana guy because he’s not going to give you a headache – I think Tswana guys are great!